Bland is so…bland – I had no idea I was a curry addict until…

Curries (royalty free image - Morguefile)
Curries (royalty free image – Morguefile)

So I am currently lying around at home recovering from throat surgery, a tonsillectomy. For those of you in the know, this is an incredibly painful procedure for adults and the recovery time is at least two weeks. Rest assured, this article will not be listing the horrors of my post-surgery life (trust me, you do NOT want to know, it’s bad) but I AM going to focus on one element of my current purgatory. Food.

Now I didn’t think I was a particularly adventurous or ‘different’ eater. My husband and I cook and eat out regularly, usually something Asian-inspired or Italian and sometimes we treat ourselves to a take-away pizza from our local (which is fabulous – inner-eastern dwellers of Melbourne, please check out Lina’s Pizza!) but I wouldn’t have said that I have ‘exotic’ tastes.

I have always taken for granted that I could eat whatever food I like; we are lucky enough to have a wonderful array of restaurants on our doorstep, Vietnamese, Burmese, Malaysian, Indian, Japanese, Thai, Italian. I would rate myself as an ‘above average’ cook and I have no food allergies so quite frankly, the world is my oyster. An average week of evening meals for me pre-surgery would have included a spicy veggie stir fry, a Malaysian, Indian or possibly Burmese curry, Cajun Salmon with some veggies, Pasta Puttenesca and/or maybe a thin crust pizza with prosciutto and mozzarella. Basically everything would have been spicy and/or tomatoey.

But post-surgery, oh how my culinary journey has been curtailed. I had no idea how exciting my diet was, what a wonderfully diverse range of cultures I could plunder for recipes, until now!!  Because right now I am restricted to bland, bland, bland. My throat is essentially raw; swallowing is painful and pretty much anything can set it aching and burning in the most upsetting way. So I have to play safe. Soup? Sure, but only if it is non-tomato based (ever cut your finger while slicing a tomato…imagine your entire throat feeling like that!). Pasta? Yep, but steady on, keep it plain, just a splash of olive oil and maybe a teeny sprinkling of parmesan. Stir fry? Why not but no chilli, ginger, garlic. Curry? Ha! I wish.  And did I mention the fact that even if I wanted a glass of wine (which I don’t!) I couldn’t; it’s not a good mix with the painkillers I am on plus I am pretty sure wine would hurt my throat just as much as tomato right now.

You may ask what on earth I have been eating for the last seven days and here it is. In all its glorious tedium:

  • wholemeal toast with a scraping of butter
  • porridge
  • pumpkin soup
  • poached eggs
  • baked potatoes
  • steamed vegetables (with no salt or pepper).

Oh, and before you ask why ice-cream isn’t on the list; let me tell you that it is an outright lie that you get to have ice-cream all the time after a tonsillectomy. Maybe that was the case in the good old days, but now you are expected to eat ‘normal meals’ straight away. And that means stuff that scrapes your throat but doesn’t ‘burn’. Plus you have to avoid excessive amounts of dairy as it – gross bit, apologies – creates mucus build up in the throat that can affect the healing process. In other words, no ice-cream.  I thought I could cheat with yoghurt, but nope, too acidic, thought my throat was on fire when I tried some.

A week on after surgery and although my appetite is finally starting to return and I am actively thinking about food again, unfortunately my throat is not playing ball; it is still way too sore to waver from the path of blandness. To distract myself as I chow down on yet another poached egg or plain baked potato (oh and did I mention that all of my food needs to be tepid – too hot and it’s like I am swallowing molten lava) I have made a list of all the food that I will be feasting on the moment my throat is healed (all washed down with the appropriate glass of wine or cider, rest assured!):

  • Lamb Rogan Josh with garlic naan
  • Chicken chilli & ginger stir fry
  • Stir fried rice
  • Tom Yum Soup or maybe a Laksa (or both!)
  • Chilli con carne
  • Dhal
  • Tapas such as patatas bravas, albondigas and chorizo
  • Every single tomato-based pasta sauce known to mankind
  • Chips (that would be ‘hot chips’ to Australians and ‘fries’ to Americans)
  • Salsa
  • Yoghurt
  • Brie, King Island Roaring Forties, in fact just cheese, cheese, cheese, cheese
  • Oranges, raspberries, rhubarb

So here’s to my swift recovery, ‘cos I have me some feasting to do!

Advertisements

It’s a (wo)man’s world

Apparently it’s International Women’s Day today, so I thought that I would write about just a few of the women who influenced and inspired me as a child and young woman. Growing up, I always felt eminently confident that I could study any topic I wanted, have any career I wanted, have any life I wanted. And much of that feeing was down to the stories of the women who had made their mark on history, who were a wonderful character in a book, women who had bucked the trend. The following are just a few of those women; it’s an eclectic selection, a personal one, and yes, I know that there are many, many more I could have listed!
Wonder Woman
Who wasn’t inspired by Wonder Woman as a young girl?! She had a truth lasso. And an invisible plane. And she always won against the bad guys. There weren’t many female superheroes when I was growing up so Wonder Woman was particularly special to me.
George from the Famous Five stories
George should be held up as an example to all girls. She’s a tomboy who doesn’t want to ‘play house’; she wants adventures; she’s fearless and most importantly, she talks back to Julian (pompous prig that he is) and has an awesome dog called Timmy. I devoured The Famous Five books as a child, and I don’t care how non-PC these stories are perceived to be now, George still rocks!
Boudicca, Queen of the Iceni
She took on the Romans and won. Well, at first; the Romans won eventually and killed her. But she gave it a damn good shot and I always loved the illustrations of her in my history book, arm raised in a fist, standing in her chariot driving towards the enemy at the head of her army. A woman leading an army. Something else that was rare in my history books. Which leads me onto…
Elizabeth I
“I know I have the body of a weak, feeble woman; but I have the heart and stomach of a king, and of a king of England too.” Elizabeth was a powerful ruler, she wasn’t a consort, she ruled in her own right. She faced down the Spanish threat, countless assassination attempts and managed relatively successfully to keep the religious in-fighting to a minimum. It was so refreshing to learn at school about a woman in control, in charge, as opposed to the endless stories of male leaders and their derring-doing.
Amelia Earhart
A female pilot. So no nonsense about women not being able to navigate or understand machinery!
Jane Austen
Yes Jane Austen was a ‘spinster’ living her quiet life in Bath. But what a waspish tongue she had, what a fabulous turn of phrase. So cutting and every word packing a punch. Her sentences are pure joy to read, the situations she wrote about still recognizable today. If I could write just one sentence in my life as perfectly crafted as one of Austen’s, I could die a happy woman.
Anita Roddick, The Body Shop founder
I have to admit I am not actually a massive fan of The Body Shop products, although I was a sucker for the banana hair putty and chamomile rinse as a teenager who wanted to be blonder but didn’t have the guts or the money for blonde highlights. But Anita Roddick was more than a woman who sold toiletries. She highlighted issues; she raised awareness of environmental challenges and supported fair trade, well before it became ‘trendy’ to be concerned about these things. A true trailblazer and one who made me realize that not every company was set up and run by men. And that women in business could be, and were, a reality.
Carmen Callil, founder of Virago
I devoured the Virago Classics novels as a teenager. Every time I saw that distinctive dark green livery and tiny apple logo on its spine in the bookstore or library, I had to have it. Antonia White. Willa Cather. Elizabeth Bowen. Writers I would never have come across, never have had the opportunity to read, if it hadn’t been for Callil’s vision for a women’s press. My heart still leaps when I see a Virago title I haven’t read yet.

There are obviously many, many more women out there who have been an inspiration to others in the past and who are an inspiration today, and I appreciate that I haven’t mentioned any female scientists, engineers, linguists, artists, but I am an English Literature graduate and books and authors will always be my inspiration in all areas of my life. In fact, if you would like to read more about fictional heroines, I suggest you read Samantha Ellis’ How to be a Heroine (Or, what I’ve learned from reading too much). It is a wonderfully entertaining book about the fictional women that have inspired and sustained the author over the years.
One last thing. At my current workplace (a publishing company), five of its seven board members are women. So not only do I read about inspirational women, read writing BY inspirational women, but I work with inspirational women every day. Who make a successful career the norm, not the exception. And so that gives me hope that maybe one day we won’t feel the need for International Women’s Days, women-only author prizes or women-only clubs. Because successful women will be the norm everywhere.

20140308-232457.jpg